What Married Couples Are Saying About the Rise in Divorces

Across living rooms, churches, and community gatherings, the topic of rapid divorces is becoming a frequent conversation. Married couples both young and old are expressing concern about why so many unions are breaking apart, often within just a few years. Ambassador Dr. David Rex Orgen observes that this concern reflects more than statistics; it speaks to the shifting mental, cultural, and emotional dynamics shaping marriage today.

The Generational View

James and Gloria, married for nearly three decades, spoke openly at a family gathering. “In our day,” James said, “marriage wasn’t about perfection. It was about endurance. You didn’t run at the first sign of trouble; you worked through it.” Gloria added, “We faced struggles, financial hardship, disagreements, even moments when we felt distant. But we held on to the belief that marriage is a lifelong covenant, not a contract you end when things get hard.”

To them, today’s rising divorces feel like a symptom of impatience and a lack of resilience. They worry that younger couples are not being equipped with the tools to weather storms.

The Younger Perspective

By contrast, Mark and Anita, who have been married for just five years, view the issue differently. “It’s not always about people giving up too quickly,” Anita explained. “Many couples are overwhelmed before they even start. The cost of living, career pressures, and emotional baggage can strain a marriage faster than people expect.” Mark added, “Social media doesn’t help. You see perfect photos and happy posts, and you start comparing your marriage to that illusion. When real life doesn’t look like the highlight reels, couples panic and feel like they’ve failed.” Their view highlights how cultural shifts and unrealistic expectations set couples up for disappointment. For them, the problem isn’t a lack of commitment; it’s a lack of preparation.

A Real-Life Story

Dr. Orgen recalls counseling a couple, Stephen and Lillian, whose marriage collapsed within two years. Outwardly, they seemed like the perfect match, educated, attractive, and deeply in love. Their wedding day was a grand celebration, but the reality of married life soon set in.
Stephen struggled with job insecurity, while Lillian wrestled with the loneliness of moving away from her family. Instead of confronting these challenges together, they began blaming each other. “I didn’t sign up for this,” Stephen once said in frustration. Lillian, hurt and exhausted, retreated emotionally.
Within months, they were living like strangers. Their conflict escalated, and the marriage ended abruptly. Looking back, both admitted that while they had prepared for a wedding, they had not prepared for the daily work of marriage.

The Deeper Lesson

These voices both from long-married couples and those newer to the journey point to the same truth: marriage is under pressure like never before. Cultural expectations, economic struggles, mental health issues, and the constant comparison culture all contribute to the rise in divorces.
As Dr. Orgen explains, “Marriage is not simply about romance it is about resilience. True love is tested not on the wedding day but in the storms that follow. Without preparation, support, and patience, couples find themselves unprepared for reality.”

A Call to Action

Dr. Orgen urges couples and communities to respond, not with blame, but with practical steps:
For Couples: Invest in your marriage daily. Communicate honestly, seek help early, and remind yourself that love is a decision as much as a feeling.

For Communities: Offer mentorship from older couples, create safe spaces for honest conversations, and normalize seeking professional counseling before crises erupt. For Individuals: Examine your own expectations. Ask: Am I prepared to grow with my partner, or am I chasing an idealized picture of marriage?

Marriage remains one of life’s most meaningful journeys, but it requires courage, preparation, and the willingness to stay the course. Because in the end, as Dr. Orgen concludes: “Strong marriages are not built on perfect moments but on imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.”

Written by Ambassador Dr. David Rex Orgen, Best-Selling Author and International Mental Health Expert