The Weight of Being the One Who “Made It”

Why Many Leave With Hope

Many leave Africa and Asia for overseas life with bright expectations. Families pray for them. Communities see them as symbols of success. Jonas left home with joy and belief in a better future. Everyone celebrated him and said he would make life easier for those behind.

The Pressure That Begins Later

Life abroad moved fast. Work filled his weeks. Bills, rent, and commitments took over. Sleep became short. Rest became rare. Yet calls from home never slowed. Someone needed help with tuition. Another needed money for medicine. A cousin needed support for a wedding. The words he often heard were simple, “You are our hope.”

At first, helping brought joy. It felt right. It felt meaningful. But slowly, pressure replaced pride.

When Giving Turns Into Emotional Strain

One day Jonas explained he needed space. He wanted to save for himself. Someone responded, “So now you think you are better than us.” The words did not spark anger. They pierced his heart.

He never wanted distance. He only wanted room to breathe.

Psychologist Dr. Harriet Lerner explained that boundaries protect connection without losing oneself. Jonas began understanding this truth.

He realized love is strongest when it does not drain a person dry.

The Pain Of Misunderstood Boundaries

Jonas learned to say no without guilt. Not because he stopped caring. Because he started caring about his health, peace, and future. Balance replaced burnout.

Supporting others remained part of his life. But he now honored his limits.

To those living this hidden weight:
You do not need to explain your fatigue.
You do not need to apologize for peace.
You are not ungrateful when you choose balance.

Your journey is not a debt others must collect.
Your life is yours to live with dignity.

If you need support with emotional pressure, family expectations, or stress from living abroad, reach out for help.

For counseling or guidance, contact
Dr. David Rex Orgen at 614 753 3925.

Written by Dr. David Rex Orgen, Best-Selling Author & International Mental Health Expert